Posted in Dying, Heart Break, Inner Feelings, Love, Uncategorized

DADDY…

They think that when I say “I’m all right”, that I am

They think that when I stop crying, that I forget

Well, nothing is all right. Nothing will never stop the pain inside.

Nothing will be the same again.

He died and nothing will change that.

He left our world, left me alone.

But I can remember his sweet smile.

I can see his comforting eyes.

I can still feel his arms around me, even if he is not here anymore.

Sometimes I talk to him and I know that no response will be received

but still I need his reassuring.

I love you daddy more than words can say

You will always be in my heart no matter where you are

and no matter how old I am, I will always be your little princess.

Posted in #contemplating, #thankful, Friendship, Inner Feelings, Love, sisterhood, Uncategorized

Inevitable Feelings

I love you

I love the way you stand,

when everything is collapsing around you.

I love your optimistic view of life,

no matter what you are going through .

I love the way you hold me tight,

when I am crying hard.

I love it when you say it’s going to be ok,

even if I know you are just saying that to comfort me.

I Love you, when you give me advices,

even when you know I am not going to take them.

I love you, when you are trying to gather all those you love around you,

even if they do not care to do that.

I love you, when you do not lose hope and keep going

I love you, when we quarrel and after a minute everything is fine

I love our memories together even if they are sad

I love your kindness and tenderness in almost everything

I love your determination to do things

I love when you behave like you know everything,

even if it’s annoying all the time 🙂

I love the way I feel that we are one soul divided into two bodies

I love that you are in my life

I love you cause you are a bless 

I love you, because you are YOU

I simply love you sister with every beat in my heart

Posted in Heart Break, Inner Feelings, Living, Love, Memories, Uncategorized

I Fell in Love with a Star

Once I fell in love with a star

It was near to me, but still too far

It was shining brightly in the sky

Anyone can recognize it, it’s not very hard

I used to talk to it all night long

But it did not talk back to me or respond

I spent years longing to reach it

But one day, I looked around and  it was gone

I told myself maybe it’s life, no more

It  takes away what we cherish the most

Days and nights then days and nights

My life was empty without your light

Darkness was all over my sky, with no clue where you are

I was shy to ask those who know you

where I can find you or how to talk to you

One day I found you, but you were not alone

You  had a fellow star that takes you home

I was happy to see you, and jealous too

I was not used to the fellow who was with you

But I told myself it’s better that way

Better than never see you all of my days

I will never talk to you like before, but yet I am happy

that you still exist in my world

I will get to see you from time to time

But deep down inside I want you, but on my own way

I longed to talk to you alone like before

without your fellow that reminds me;

that you are not mine anymore

One day I saw you from afar

you were with your fellow star

And behind you, I can see a baby one

I cried so hard and I knew that you were gone

You  will never be mine alone

Days and nights then days and nights

My life was empty without your light

Then one day, I found you alone in my sky

You needed a friend, and here you are

We talked together like never before

You made me feel complete and whole

You used to come to talk each night

and I used to fell asleep in your light

I told you all what I have inside

I want you to come for the rest of my life

But once again you come and go

After I used to expect you every night, you are not here anymore

Right now, I look to the sky and pray

To catch a glimpse of you anyway

Will I spend my life like that?

Will I wait for you to appear again from time to time?

Will I be always in love with you my star?

No matter where you go,

I know you will always be right here in my heart.

Posted in #contemplating, Heart Break, Inner Feelings, life Lesson, Memories, Uncategorized

Where did your love go? (2003)

Two months have gone since you left me 
I thought time would heal the pain inside me 
But I stand still watching my body collapsing 
I can’t bear your absence; it seems everlasting 
You’ve said that you’ll be there for me 
But you left me as if you don’t need me 
I told myself that I’ve to be stronger 
But when I think of us; I can’t stand it any longer 
I remember you when you told me that you would never leave 
Now I have to stand as a dry leave; 
Left in a windy night to face her fate, 
Over a neglected tree that seems broken and pail. 
Why you did that I do not know. 
But I can’t help but hope that someday you’ll know, 
that the lady you left in the middle of the road; 
was the only one that needed you and was ready to give you her soul. 

Posted in # senses, #contemplating, #thankful, Heart Break, life Lesson, Memories, Uncategorized

Back to your senses

Have you ever thought about your senses and how they are important to you?

All that you can say is that they are very important to our life and body… blah blah blah but I were not talking about their significance to your life or your body, on the contrary, my question was targeting your souls.  Let me assure you that our souls need every sense we have and let me prove it to you.

Our sight captures every beautiful picture that crosses our eyes. It saves the beauty in our mind to recall it when we need a memory for what we felt in that place. The memory does not rely on the place and its beauty, it relies on how it touched our souls, what we felt while we were there.

Hearing a great song that touches the heart, sharing it with your beloved ones, singing it very often that it became carved inside your mind and when you accidentally hear it after a long time all the memories come back alive. The song we heard is not the memory but how it made us feel. I had a special song for each of my boyfriends – those I had all my life, each one reminds me of the one I heard the song with him. 🙂

Tasting a delicious ice-cream that you shared with your best friend after school. Its taste lasts on your tongue like forever. When you eat it one more time you can remember everything like it was yesterday. It’s not the ice-cream taste that holds the memory, it’s who you eat it with and how was your soul then.

The first touch from the one you love. How you felt back then and how your mind and soul captures the feeling like it would slip away any minute and you cherish it for a lifetime. Remembering it makes you feel like you were touched this exact moment and you feel your soul freshened as if your back again with him.

Smelling is my favorite sense… yes smelling. You can’t explain this sense at all. You smell something and it can put you in a bad mood or a good mood. My boyfriend used to wear one of ARMANI perfumes- I don’t remember the name – but whenever I smell it, I remember all the old good days, the bad times and the breakup…. it all comes back to me as if I was reliving all the story all over again. It can change my mood from bad to good and vice versa. When I smell it my brain stops working as if to tell me to stop, to think over, you had lived with that smell the good and the bad times but now it no longer exists in your life – he is gone. His smell is still carved in my mind but I guess he used it to cover his decayed soul.

“Perfume is a disguise. Since the middle ages, we have worn masks of fruit and flowers in order to conceal from ourselves the meaty essence of our humanity.” – TomRobbins, Wild Ducks Flying Backward.

Our senses are the main tools for our brain to keep the memories inside. Make your senses hold the beauty in everything and erase the ugliness from everything. Even if something turned up ugly at the end, be content that it happened from the start and be thankful that you did not have to cope with it until the end of your days.